My dear Global Yoga Community,
Some of you might remember the story of my mother and I not having a good relationship. Each time when I would go and visit, I would think ‘she can’t hurt me anymore, I am past that point and age’ etc.
Boom – there she did it again. This year I went to see her and I felt deep inside of me that she can’t anymore.
Guess what?! She couldn’t even though she said hurtful things again. I am grateful for the Human Garage and their facial maneuvers that lead me to feel changes physical, mentally and emotionally.
“Change is not something that we should fear. Rather, it is something that we should welcome.”
~ Nelson Mandela
That being said this is not the end of the journey. So many more layers are waiting to be peeled off.
I have been working on self love and I progressed a bit by setting more boundaries, making myself the priority etc.
Last weekend when I did my first IG reel for the human garage, I fell into a big crises. Seeing and hearing myself in the reel over and over again while I tried to edit, let a storm break loose inside of me. I tried to ignore my feelings of shame, self-judgment, criticism, embarrassment and posted it anyways. I could feel myself spinning down, everything narrowed down on me and I had a huge crying fit. I had no idea that this would hit me so hard and I could tell that came from way deep inside and was tucked away very well.
This as an other example of me thinking I am loving myself by doing all the right steps, but I am far from feeling self love. I am sharing this so openly, because being vulnerable shines light on my darkness and I hope to inspire some of you to look at yourself where you are just rationalizing and thinking and where you really can feel the depth of that emotion.
Teaching movement is my safe heaven where I am of the picture. When I feel my body and all the information comes to me in the moment. All critics inside of me are not present and I enjoy the movement, being at service.
How does it feel
I am grateful for your appreciation and trust in my evolving, changing classes!